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"Granted" Newsletter, May 2019 by Adam Grant


In this month's "Granted" newsletter, Adam Grant brings us articles about: reframing how we view apologies, the benefits of returning to the pen and paper as a valuable writing tool, and the dangers of creating jobs that do not feel purposeful . Click on each article title to read more. You can subscribe to the "Granted" newsletter here.

Granted: May 2019

For the past six years, ever since I published Give and Take, people have been asking me to write a children’s book on generosity. They wanted a book that would encourage kids to think about themselves as givers. And for six years, I had absolutely nothing to give. Recently, that changed thanks to Allison Sweet Grant. She’s a psychiatric nurse practitioner, a writer, and my wife. After listening to me talk (a lot) about givers and takers, she had an idea for a story to communicate the key message to kids. We ended up writing a picture book together about a gift box in search of a giver, and I’m excited to announce that it will debut October 1.

THE GIFT INSIDE THE BOX (or as our kids call it, “the box book”) is available for preorder now.

Now, onto my favorite articles for adults this month:

When you apologize, you're not putting yourself down. You're expressing concern for how your actions affect others.Don't be sorry for saying sorry. Being quick to apologize is a sign of empathy.

Ditch the computer and try a pen. Writing a draft by hand can boost idea generation, improve recall, and stop you from interrupting your flow to edit. It may feel slower, but the pen is still mightier than the keyboard.

3. The Bullsh*t-Job Boom Economies grow when unemployment rates are low, but they don't flourish until employment rates in meaningful work are high. Too many people are stuck in useless jobs that benefit no one. Instead of just creating jobs, we need to be creating useful jobs.

From My Desk:

To remember things you read, don't reread or highlight. Instead: (a) Consolidate: take a 10-minute break in a quiet place (b) Quiz yourself: test your recall and identify gaps (c) Share: make it stick by teaching someone else about it

Mentors give advice and believe in our potential. Coaches get in the arena to help us realize our potential. Great managers are great coaches. They help us see our blind spots, work through our sore spots, and build on our strengths. For those of you who have been listening to WorkLife, stay tuned for two bonus episodes. In the meantime, you can find everything from season 2 here:

Cheers, Adam

Adam Grant, Ph.D.

Author of ORIGINALS and GIVE AND TAKE, coauthor of OPTION B, and Wharton professor.

Do you have any thoughts on these topics? Please leave a comment below


"Never Eat Alone" by Keith Ferrazzi with Tahl Raz


An excellent book that cuts through the noise of how to network.

Clearly, the term Networking is difficult to swallow. I have yet to find someone who embraces it. Most clients seem to put it in the same category as being a “salesman”; smarmy, self centered and bordering on the unethical. They feel that, like sales, Networking comes naturally and needs not be a focus.

Wrong.

An easy way to think less pejoratively, call it CONNECTING.

My experience is that those who consciously connect others and build out their networks are tremendously more successful and valuable to our society. Using Adam Grant’s terminology, they are Givers.

The main takeaways of this book are:

1) Reciprocity/Generosity. Be a giver. Individuals cannot possibly succeed like a team. Ask for help. Build a team by being helpful to others. Find ways to make others more successful. Also, get a mentor! No one will have as big an impact on your business, your career, your life.

2) Set Your Goal. This is the intersection of your strength/weaknesses and your dreams and desires. "A goal is a dream with a deadline." Put it down on paper.

3) Create a Personal "Board of Advisors." Identify those people who can, should, be most influential in achieving your dream.

4) Relationship Action Plan. This is Keith's biggest new take. He gives you a simple idea for a spreadsheet to get your goals achieved. Step one: Identify goals. Step two: who can help? Step 3: How do I reach out to these people?

5) Get Referrals. This is straighforward. Identify connections between those who like you, and support you and those you feel you need to know. Get them to vote for you!

6) Add one new person/week. Sounds simple. Tough to do. Be genuine. Be bold. You have to make the ask. Find something you have in common with them.

7) Don't focus on your self-interest. Focus on theirs.

8) Do your homework. "Spectacular achievement is always preceded by spectacular preparation." -Schuller

9) Make lists of names. Friends, family, ex colleagues, etc. Make sure to add "aspirational" names. If you plan on meeting them, you can do it!!

10) Arrange group sessions. Dinners, outtings, events that pull people together that will be interesting and helpful. They need to see the benefit of coming together with you.

11) Connect with Connectors. Identify those people who are influential and can and can make the referrals. (Lawyers, VC, Headhunters, journalists, politicians)

12) Master the art of small talk. Ask about them? Their vacations, their families. They will think you are fantastic!

13) Stay in touch. Much of the art of connecting is staying in touch. "80% of success is just staying in touch." Plan on an annual/semi annual call/visit/note.

14) Repetition. To get someone to move from a contact to a friend, they need to see you via at least 3 modes of communication: email/phone call/face to face. That is a start. Then ping them monthly (email or call). Then make sure you see them face to face twice a year.

15) Co create. Get others to help you with your problem/project.

16) Be King of Content. Be the person who is a SME. Send out information that will help others. (like a book review?)

17) Be Interesting.

18) Be a Mentor, Be a Mentee. Repeat

Please feel free to comment on any of these recommendations and suggest other sources that might be helpful.


"Language Intelligence" by Joseph J Romm


The stated purpose of the book is to look at rhetoric as a tool of persuasion.

Some Tips:

1) Use short words. Long florid phrases pale in comparison to short compact, punchy words. Think Churchill and Shakespeare. Or Obama "Yes, We Can." Trump "MAGA"

2) REPEAT. We know that the listeners brain remembers things that are repeated. Therefore, Repeat, repeat, repeat.

3) IRONY; When facing a difficult debate, often it works to turn the tables.

4) FORESHADOWING: There’s a dramatic principle known as Chekhov’s gun. If a play begins with a pistol on stage, you can be certain it will be fired before the final act.

5) METAPHORS: The brain uses metaphors to structure, compress and file information. (Wilson, Biophilia, 1984) Jesus as shepherd.

6) NEGATIONS: The title of George Lakoff’s 2004 book is “Don’t think of an Elephant!” …. Too late, you just did. Planting the seed but prefacing it with Don’t, will have the opposite effect. Sales go up when salesperson says “you don’t have to buy this today”.

Please feel free to comment on any of these recommendations and suggest other sources that might be helpful.


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